Before He Cheats
by Maelana-Malfoy
Summary: What happens when you mix an angry witch, firewhisky and a karaoke bar? R&R please...


_Bang Bang Bang_ ... 'Hermione Leigh Granger, if you don't open this door this instant you won't have one!!!'

'Nobody's home, go away.' Hermione said towards the door where she knew a very irrate Ginerva Ann Weasley was fuming.

'If you think I buy that cock-a-ninny your in for a rude awaking, now about this door... one... two... Well it's good to see you have some sence left in you... the ice cream was about to melt!' Ginny said as the door swung open.

'Ice cream? What kind?' Hermione asked.

'Cappachino mocha for you and mint chocolate chip for me.' She went straight to the kitchen of Hermione's flat and looked at the mess that should never have been in a five mile radius of the Hermione Granger she knew. The sink was half full of dishes, the trash needed dumped and there were pots and pans still on the stove from the last time she cooked. 'Like what you've done with the place Mya. Looks more like a home than a doctors office.'

'If you've come over just to harrass me you obviously know where the door is located.'

'I didn't come to harrass, I brought comfort food! Are there any clean bowls in this flat?'

Five hours, three rental chick flicks, two gallons of ice cream, and one box of tissues later...

'I feel better now, thank you Ginny I never should have doubted you.'

'Good because you are going to quit moping around this place and go out to the club with me tonight, we've got an hour to get you showered, dressed and made up before they start Karaoke Night down at Ron and Seamuses club.' Ginny said.

'Karaoke Night? Goodness I haven't been to the Crimson Clover in... well... a long time.' She hadn't been since before ... 'Give me thirty.'

Twenty nine minutes later the two girls apparated to Hogsmeade and strolled into the Crimson Clover. Hermione had dressed in a black leather bustia top with red lace trimings that showed off her ample cleavage and hung just above the ruby lion dangling from her naval. Stone washed low rise hip hugger jeans and three inch heels. Her hair hung down in a straight curtain of chocolate brown with coke bottle red highlights, her makeup was done to perfection showing her golden hershey eyes and long, dark, thick lashes, a light blush and a brown gloss on her lips.

'HERMIONE!!!!' She looked up to see Ron and Seamus comming toward her and grinned, she hadn't been out of her flat in nearly three days and everyone seemed worried about her.

Well almost everyone. She just caught sight of sleek silver blonde hair and on second look she saw him with none other than Pansy 'Easy-Is-As-Easy-Does' Parkinson. 'Hey Ron, Seamus, how's it goin'?' She tried not to show her emotions yet felt as if her hard shell was as transparent as Nearly-Headless Nick.

'Mya... Are you ok?' Ginny asked looking around. She just caught sight of Malfoy. 'I'm sorry, maybe we shouldn't have come...'

'No worries, anyone broken my record yet?' She asked the boys.

'Not yet, but Harry's tied with you. He's gonna try tonight.'

'Not a chance.' Hermione said showing something of her usual vibrant self.

After about four shots of firewhiskey and quite a few butterbeers, Hermione was feeling a little bubbly and a lot more angry as she watched Malfoy and Parkinson dance to the song Lips of an Angel sung by Harry.

'And following that brilliant perfomance by Harry Potter will be the woman trying to save her title, Hermione Granger!' Hermione sauntered up to the stage and took the mike from Ron.

'Thank you Ron and sorry Harry but your not gonna beat my record!' she winked at him. 'This one goes out to all those girls out there who don't get mad,... they get even!' She looked pointedly towards Draco, his cold silver eyes narrowing near slits.

"Right now he's prob'ly dancin' with a bleach blonde tramp and she's prob'ly gettin' frisky

Right now he's prob'ly buyin' her some fruity little drink 'cuz she can't shoot whiskey

Right now he's prob'ly up behind her with a pool stick showin' her how ta' shoot a combo

And he don't know...

I dug my key into the side of his pretty little suped up four-wheel drive

Carved my name into his leather seats

Took a louisville slugger to both headlights

Slashed a hole in all four tires

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats"

Hermione was singing up a storm, letting loose all the fury she had held in this past week.

"Right now she's prob'ly up singin' some white trash version of Shania-Karaoke

Right now she's prob'ly sayin' I'm drunk and he's thinkin' I'm gonna get lucky

Right now he's prob'ly dabbin' on three dollars worth of that bathroom polo

And he don't know...

That I dug my key into the side of his pretty little suped up four-wheel drive

Carved my name into his leather seats

I took a louisville slugger to both headlights

Slashed a hole in all four tires

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats"

As she looked around the room she saw Draco turn a madding red that clashed greatly with his sleek silver hair. She was loving the feeling of elation it brought her.

"I mighta saved a little trouble for the next girl

'Cuz the next time that he cheats

You know it won't be on me... no not on me

'Cuz I dug my key into the side of his pretty little suped up four-wheel drive

Carved my name into his leather seats

I took a louisville slugger to both headlights

Slashed a hole in all four tires

Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

Ooo maybe next time he'll think before he cheats

Before he cheats

Ooo oo ooo"

She watched as Draco snatched Pansy's wrist and drug her from the bar a small smirk placed on her lips for his benefit.

'Sorry Harry, but there's no doubt that this weeks winner is... HERMIONE GRANGER!!!!' The crowd roared with approval.

'Maybe next time Harry, but you'll never beat my record!'


End file.
